


An Undesirable Passion

by Infiniteskye



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Gen, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-22
Updated: 2015-05-17
Packaged: 2018-03-02 19:59:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2824328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Infiniteskye/pseuds/Infiniteskye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mayuzumi vaguely decides to recall the moment he met Akashi and realizes that before and after said incident, his life had not really changed. Everything was still a bit of a pain. It's just that afterwards, instead of having to deal with being constantly overshadowed in basketball, he had to deal with a group of extremely cheeky kouhais, with the youngest serving as his King.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Mayuaka has always been incredibly close to my heart.

It was a pain.

Mayuzumi Chihiro did not remember when the world of high school basketball became as incredibly retarded as he knew today.

There was no such thing as hard work, no such thing as effort, and no such thing as experience that came with age.

All basketball was nowadays is that if you were talented enough to be above the rest, you would get to play. Otherwise, you were out of the game.

That was all.

Mayuzumi pensively tilted his head up at the sky. No, scratch that. He had a clear idea when this disease decided to spread itself inside the throes of Rakuzan basketball.

It was when the coach, quick to deem victory a mere standard for the basketball team, decided to recruit three self-absorbed crownless generals who, in their reign of supremacy, basically ignored everyone else on the team.

Mayuzumi's gaze intensified, identifying an ignorant array of blue and puffy clouds that hardly served as a pathetic fallacy to his mood.

He wondered how he managed to live through another year in the club, overshadowed by the light of the geniuses like so many of his fellow string members.

In fact, there were only three third-years left in the club—no two to be precise because he too…gave up.

How boring was basketball now?

This year, the first-year kid, who usurped the position of point guard and captain from one of the last standing third-year was one of the Generation of Miracles, the captain that exuded perfection unlike no other.

All morale was crushed for the rest of the members.

Their era never had a chance to begin.

Mayuzumi sighed, flipping to the next page of an appropriately titled light novel, before a felt-layered voice asked, "Good afternoon, Mayuzumi-sempai. How are you?"

Mayuzumi Chihiro promptly stowed away his novel, a brow raised at the informal address, as the words "Chuunibyou", scrawled across the front cover, appealed to the corner of his eye.

Yet, from that moment, he was certain, that he would become simply another page in the light novel he once idly indulged upon.

What a messed up novel it was.

From first encounter, Mayuzumi Chihiro had an inkling that Akashi Seijuro, despite his autocratic and perfectly concocted demeanor, had some serious denial issues.

The kid was clearly homesick and was probably ditched by that phantom friend of his that he practically told Mayuzumi to become.

"You are similar to someone I know."

"I can teach you the same skills and give you a place as a regular."

He was quick to group Mayuzumi with the boy, saying that they both had a low presence and were both individuals who accepted it.

In retrospect, Akashi's obsession was deep, as though he was overjoyed that he could have a chance to replace his phantom player—out of denial that he probably missed the kid, or out of need for a new goal only he could see.

Whatever the case was, Mayuzumi could not tell. He had only been arguably speaking to the red-head for around 8 minutes or so.

However, from that, he did establish something about Akashi's former phantom player—that he sounded like someone who basically listened to every word Akashi said.

From being rejected, ignored, and tossed into the shadows repeatedly, Mayuzumi Chihiro had become far too jaded to allow himself to be compared to someone as naive as that.

Under normal circumstances, he would've politely, but in this case, be it from a sudden sense of pride he never seemed to have felt prior, he merely released a slightly tantalizing smirk and said, "no. I don't know who you think I am but I kinda like myself."

"…" Akashi stared at him, surprised but patient, awaiting the continuation.

"If I'm going to be the same as him, rumored to be only a passing specialist, then I'm not going to play. If it's not going to make me happy, there's no point." Mayuzumi bluntly refused, figuring he would end this farce with this clearly lonely kid who had some serious obsession with replacing friends.

Yet, instead of complying, a dangerous smirk angled itself across Akashi Seijuro's lips as he laughed, "Of course. I never intended you to be the same from the start anyways."

Mayuzumi blinked. "What?"

"You've caught my attention…much more than before…and you will certainly become someone who can surpass Tetsuya." Akashi revealed, as though everything had already been decided.

Mayuzumi raised a brow. Was it him or was this wacko first-year completely exuding dominance over him?

He was too jaded to appreciate such a notion.

He stared at the light novel that had somehow found itself in Akashi's hands.

"…Then I'll join. But, you'll have to do something in return." Mayuzumi began, the mere proposition causing a hint of surprise to rise across Akashi's brows.

"And that is?"

"That I'll probably end up taking more time to learn those skills…so, read that in my stead."

Akashi stared down at the cover with an anime-styled girl. A small smirk danced across his lips, "interesting…that's fine." The red-head agreed, eyes locked on the strange cover.

Mayuzumi eyed the teen. "Hey you're not allowed to judge."

"I didn't plan to." Akashi refuted.

Mayuzumi sighed. "…Then I look forward to working with you, Captain." He said, with an added smirk at the end.

Akashi formed a rather bemused smile as he returned the gesture.

On that day, Mayuzumi Chihiro felt strangely accomplished for managing to seemingly differentiate himself from the phantom boy.

Yet, that shouldn't have been his reason to comply to the whole scheme because really, he ended up regretting this a lot.

After all, a problem naturally arose.

The book was lent on a whim—without any expectations.

Yet, it turned out that Akashi was quite taken with "Chuunibyou."

Far too taken.

[=]

It turned out that Akashi was a man of his words.

"Chuunibyou is in short, a syndrome where the affected people act as though they are different from anyone else." Akashi Seijuro began, summarizing the story page by page as he handed the book back to a clearly startled Mayuzumi.

"You read it?" Mayuzumi blinked, hands gripping the book.

"Yes. I believe that was in the deal." Akashi returned, as if it was the most obvious thing to do. "Did you want a more in-depth analysis?"

"…No."

"Then good." Akashi nodded as he headed over to the bench and reached for a basketball.

The two were both in sports garb, ready to show the other what they had agreed upon yet Mayuzumi was still slightly hung over the fact someone like him took the time to indulge in what only Mayuzumi and the rest of the "normals" would consider good.

"…Rather than an in-depth analysis, did you enjoy it?" Mayuzumi asked.

Picking up a ball, Akashi turned back, heterochromatic eyes rather surprised. "Did I enjoy it? That wasn't on my mind."

"…So you didn't?"

Akashi shook his head and briefly, released a curt smile, in recollection of the quirky situations the book had depicted. "No, it was enjoyable." He said, as Mayuzumi only stared at him, unable to utter a word.

It never occurred to him that Akashi would read it. It never occurred to him that Akashi would enjoy it. He simply seemed so far away, as a kouhai, as a captain, and as a esteemed individual.

"…Then would you like to read the continuation?" Mayuzumi found himself somehow offering.

And Akashi took the second volume.

They spent the rest of practice with Akashi teaching how to pass, how to utilize misdirection, and many other factors.

Although Mayuzumi Chihiro had not been looking forward to being constantly lectured by a shortie 2 years his junior, particularly one that exuded all the perfection they had all strove to possess, Mayuzumi felt…that he had fun.

Yet, it was too early for him to tell exactly what the scarlet-haired boy was thinking for him to be completely satisfied.

Did he see this training as Mayuzumi's development or…"Tetsuya's"?

Mayuzumi did not recall when he began to care about such.


	2. Chapter 2

Without a doubt he thought of himself as a special snowflake, one that possibly superseded all the other special snowflakes.

With phrases ranging from, “I am absolute” to “those that oppose me will be killed”, his tale of gore in Rakuzan had no end.

However, unlike other Chuunibyou sufferers, the red-head had reason to be as he was.

Akashi Seijuro was, frankly right about anything and everything and held so much knowledge that from macroeconomics to the smallest details of daily life, there was nothing he was unaware of in that 1/8th of that 173cm body of his.

 He could, of course, “predict the future” with such startling accuracy that none would be surprised to find out that he was superhuman, if he wasn’t already.

Still, even if Akashi was an actual Deity from the heavens, Mayuzumi still had a thought unlike what most would choose to think of him, no matter how much they wanted to.

Right, that Akashi Seijuro was probably one of the loneliest kids on the block.

He was just very adept at disguising it.

Upon being entered into first string, Mayuzumi received quite a few quirked eyebrows from people who were all his juniors as he supressed the boiling annoyance that crawled up his skin, commanding him to massacre them all.

Even though he accepted the newly structured hierarchy of the strong within Rakuzan, it didn’t mean he liked it. At all.

In fact, things merely got worse for him when the juniors began circulating rumors about him bowing down to a first-year in order to get his position.

At this point, Mayuzumi Chihiro felt ready to quit all over again because special treatment from a kouhai that had everyone’s heads lowered towards him meant nothing but trouble after all.

Nevertheless, Mayuzumi Chihiro kept quiet, and placed his efforts in training instead. If he could become as amazing as Akashi, with those eyes that reflected absolute confidence said he would, then that was enough for him.

If he can play, and play well, that was enough for him.

He had long forgotten how to expect anything more.

Yet, on a particularly bad day of this continued farce, where the juniors went overboard and said something within earshot of Akashi and Mayuzumi while the two were passing through, naturally with Akashi irritably in front, Akashi for once, displayed a rather human quality.

"Mayuzumi-sempai, are you bothered?" He asked flatly.

The third-year blinked, surprised by his sudden concern before he bluntly sighed, “and I thought you knew all? This probably would’ve happened if I joined anyways.”

"Well certainly that was preempted but, you haven’t answered my question," Akashi returned.

"Well, it’s a tough decision to make, on whether I should disclose that or lie to a kouhai" Mayuzumi said, that hint of sarcasm present in his voice, as though he was releasing just a bit of his hidden frustrations.

Akashi stared at him meaningfully as they turned a corner and entered the deserted club room.

The door closed with a silent click.

"Chihiro."

Mayuzumi reared back. “…What did you just call me?”

Akashi blinked innocently. “Chihiro. I’ll say it as many times you require it.”

Mayuzumi made a face. Half the time, he did not understand what was going through that head of his, smart and appalling at the same time. “Then don’t say it altogether. Why do I have to stand for kouhai to address me so familiarly?”

"Well, before I’m your kouhai, I’m your captain." Akashi confidently concluded.

Mayuzumi stared at him, eyes squinting from disbelief. “…surely you mean after.”

"Surely not, because as the captain, granted this position under the condition of bringing absolute victory to Rakuzan, I have chosen you to represent my resolve. Not anyone but you Chihiro." He stated, a fond ring in his velvet voice as he pronounced his name.

Mayuzumi Chihiro did not generally liked his first name. He was constantly mistaken for a girl from it, leading to future trauma. However, the way Akashi said it made it feel nice…like he was …needed.

That, did not happen before.

However, instead of gushing into a puddle of goo from Akashi’s sudden faith, Mayuzumi only smirked, “is that so? Then hopefully you won’t be wrong,”

Nope, he was not going to let some kid two years his junior get the best of him. Nope.

But Akashi only took this chance to melt him to goop.

A predatory smirk uplifted his expression. “That’s too impudent of you Chihiro. You will succeed. I am never wrong.” That second personality of his declared, heterochromatic laser beams digging at Mayuzumi’s resolve.

From experience, he knew he was not going to argue whenever Akashi turned sanguinary. What if he got into something worse what he had already partaken in?

"Ah, but before that." Akashi began, staring right at him with a hint of teeth. "I suggest you mask your emotions better Chihiro. If you don’t stay silent, you can’t become a shadow."

"…And I thought we agreed that I was going to become more than that."

Another bemused look spread across the red-head’s lips. Was it him or did it seem as though Akashi really enjoyed being defied.

But of course, it was hard to tell whether he was bemused or ready to kill.

"You are. But to surpass something, you need to first become it."

Mayuzumi momentarily paused at this statement, the dead look settling in his eyes making it impossible for his expression to betray him.

For the longest time, there was one thing he wanted to ask whilst on this endlessly crazed journey.

"…If I became that shadow, how do I know if I wasn’t sucked in and became someone else entirely?"

For a moment, Mayuzumi swore he saw Akashi’s brow twitch. “What are you talking about Chihiro? From the start, you have been sucked in. Did you plan on turning back?”

Mayuzumi frowned. It was as though he was being challenged by a kid two years his junior. He sighed. “Nope. Since I’m already here and as long as I’m happy, I’ll stick around for a bit longer.”

Akashi smiled. “Good.”

However, Akashi Seijuro never did address the intent behind Mayuzumi’s words.

Truthfully, they were directed at the red-head and, his obsession with that phantom of his past.

"What was that pass?!" One of the audience member cried as Mayuzumi stared at his well-practiced hands and wondered how naturally the timing came to invisibly pass the ball.

He privately relished the look his receiver, Hayama Koutarou had before he fell out of reverie and promptly went to shoot.

There goes that highly irritating kitty kid. Such thoughts of accomplishment momentarily floated around his mind until Mayuzumi learned that afterwards…it would lead to even more awkward special treatment.

The second year trio warmed up to him right away.

[=]

"Nice pass!"

"Good job!" They exclaimed with chilling familiarity as they somehow managed to spot and invite him to sit with them at lunch.

Mayuzumi expression soured in the most impossibly subtle way. He did not understand why these three who pretended the rest of the first-string members were air were speaking to him.

He supposed it was probably due to Akashi, whose serene figure was sitting beside Mibuchi, as though he did not have any friends his own age.

"Mayuzumi-sempai, want to sit with us?" Hayama offered, at least remembering his manners as Mayuzumi shook his head.

"Sorry but I’m going to eat with friends," Mayuzumi bluffed as really, all he wanted was the slink back onto the rooftop and idly watch clouds pass by.

"Aww that’s too bad," Hayama frowned while Mibuchi stared at him, as though analyzing the person "Akashi chose" with care.

"Chihiro."

Mayuzumi immediately flinched. No, he did not just-

"Oh! You’re called Chihiro?!" Hayama exclaimed. "That’s such a cute girl name!" He continued, beginning to guffaw.

"Hey, don’t say that! It’s a beautiful name, very romantic" Mibuchi smiled in reassurance, only managing to make the power forward shake even harder.

Yet on the outside, he was nothing but a blank face as he stoically ignored them and turned to his captain.

"Yes?" He asked.

"Here, I need to return this to you," Akashi said as he handed him a light novel with a cute cat girl on the cover.

Everyone immediately jumped away from the table.

"MPH!" Nebuya Eikichi, absorbed only in his food, suddenly choked as he stood up, taking his precious gyuudon in hand.

Mayuzumi forced his expression to blank.

He was not going to get involved in this.

"S-sei-chan? W-what are you holding?" Mibuchi uttered incredulously.

"Ah, it’s a light novel. Do you not read these?" Akashi said.

Mibuchi made a face, one immediately interpreted by Mayuzumi to scream,  _who gave my Sei-chan this image-ruining disaster?!_

"N-no I don’t but I found it even more surprising that you did," Mibuchi managed to nicely phrase.

Suddenly, Mayuzumi felt as though he was in grave danger.

But also highly offended.

He rather enjoyed reading them during his leisure time.

He wrinkled his nose.

"That’s actually mine." Mayuzumi suddenly offered.

The trio locked onto him.

"Oh! So it was yours sempai! No wonder, I didn’t expect Akashi to read that type of book," Hayama laughed off.

Mayuzumi pursed his lips. “Oh and is that bad?” He suddenly asked.

The trio blinked. “No, not at all,” Mibuchi calmly intervened.

Suddenly, a smirk spread across Mayuzumi’s lips, his dead eyes lit alive. “Then that’s good then, because he’s the one who wanted to borrow this from me, right Akashi?” He asked, slyly, leaning in and retrieving the novel from Akashi’s hands.

A knowing smile danced on the red-head lips. “Indeed. It was certainly an interesting read.” Akashi agreed to the shock of the Uncrowned Generals.

The slightest frown crinkled Mayuzumi’s eyes. He did not expect Akashi to be supporting his impulsive sempai-complex endeavors but then again, Akashi most likely planned this from the start.

"Well, since this is back, I’ll be leaving now," he excused himself, leaving for the solace of his rooftop without looking back.

He didn’t need to see their reactions to know that he made an impact. Things always did when Akashi happened to be the topic in question.

However, his slight enjoyment soon dissipated once he headed back down to the lunch room for a chocolate milk he had forgotten to buy and found Akashi there as well. 

The red-head turned to him in brief acknowledgement as he took a vanilla-flavored soy milk from the counter.

Just as he passed him, Mayuzumi spoke. “Hey, you were aiming for me to do that weren’t you?” He asked, attempting to confirm what Akashi had intended.

Akashi pursed his lips thoughtfully. “Perhaps. I do need you to properly build a connection with the team after all,”

The phantom player’s expression dithered.

"I don’t need that." He coldly stated, turning on his heels for the exit.

It was only until he left did he realize where his dissatisfaction had stemmed from, that he was expected to become close with anyone other than Akashi.

He immediately wrinkled his brows.

Anyone other than Akashi?

When did he become  _close with Akashi_?

[=]

Come Winter and numerous gruelling practices, Mayuzumi found himself completely integrated with the team.

Like he told Akashi, he rarely ever interacted with the Uncrowned Generals but did end up becoming strangely capable of coordinating wordless plays with them, with Akashi even as he one day decided to show all that shorties could dunk and told him to pass the ball at the perfect location.

Mayuzumi admittedly complied because he had hoped to see Akashi fail but of course, Akashi Seijuro does not fail.

He could only smile with filial affection before catching himself and silently berating his actions.

He was like a puppet in Akashi’s grand scheme, an unwilling one who was slowly breaking down into everything Akashi wanted him to be, losing his sense of self in the process.

Yet, he nearly thought he could live with it, until he met Kuroko Tetsuya.

[=]

Kuroko Tetsuya was a rather short individual for a basketball player. In fact, he was even shorter than  _Akashi_  and had a rather weak build.

After what he witnessed throughout the Winter Cup, Mayuzumi learned that Kuroko was not even capable of basic offensive techniques unless he incorporated his misdirection.

He was the definition of underdog, his experience and the underlying pain shaping his every move.

If Mayuzumi was anyone else, he most likely would’ve felt moved. Instead, he felt strangely threatened.

“No, if it’s Tetsuya, things may not end here.”

The words of Akashi wafted irritatingly through his ears as he obligingly watched Seirin’s match against Kaijou, suddenly recalling the information Akashi once quite  _fondly_  give him.

Kuroko Tetsuya had started  _even lower_  than him and worked his way up through sheer effort.

That was the main point.

However, from the beginning of their estranged relationship, it would not be incorrect to say that Mayuzumi Chihiro’s current efforts were all to mirror him, just as Akashi Seijuro  _willed._

In fact, it would be correct to say that the current reason he is allowed on the team is to become Kuroko, to  _surpass him._

But Mayuzumi was never one with willpower or overly glorified things such as motivation.

With one glance, he immediately understood he could never be exactly like him, much less surpass him.

He hardly had the monstrous determination Kuroko held.

He clenched his fists.

[=]

The inevitable match against Seirin soon commenced.

Yet, the irony of it all was, that Mayuzumi played without ever having to face that irritating pang within him as without even trying, Kuroko Tetsuya fell to his own demise.

Unlike him, his determination led him to shine, to erase his own shadow that was the source of his strength.

When Mayuzumi saw him fall, crumble, and be subbed out for what seemed inevitably until the end of the match, a pathetic sense of relief washed over him.

He looked to Akashi for answers as the red-head’s eyes remained cold, as though that respect he held for Kuroko had been replaced with the imminent desire to win. Through that complete indifference, something cruel escaped his lips.

“Chihiro. Be prepared to be subbed on. For the next part, I’m going to have you display your true abilities.” Akashi ordered in that perfectly flat voice.

Mayuzumi was not surprised but he found himself unable to conceal this feeling of betrayal. Didn’t this mean, that from the start, Akashi had never meant for Mayuzumi to confront Kuroko, to  _surpass_ him in every manner and rather, just be a stand-In cheap replacement to secure Rakuzan’s victory?

And Mayuzumi wasn’t sure if that was all that Kuroko would otherwise secure.  _Akashi_  for example, seemed to be extremely fixated on him, tackling him with ever demeaning vocabulary he carried in that vast information-based brain of his to crumble Kuroko’s spirit.

Truly, this was very hypocritical of him. But Mayuzumi could not object. He didn’t have the heart to surpass Kuroko after all. He played basketball only for himself. Therefore, with his original values in mind, he should have had no qualms with this set-up.

As such, Mayuzumi strode onto the court, his debut immediately leaving a huge psychological impact on the opposition as he snuck into the shadows, and surpassed them by jumping up into the light and easily scoring a three-pointer to Seirin’s dismay.

“If you were to call Tetsuya the old model, then he would be the new model of the phantom 6th man,” Akashi Seijuro stated in a dull and factual manner. But while Mayuzumi was listening to this rather embarrassing analogy, he could sense a hint of pleasure in Akashi’s words.

Ah, he was Akashi’s doll, for him to show off—to a certain blue-haired first year that had his eyes widened in shock.

Mayuzumi gripped the air, a certain emotion rushing within him as a ball was sent to him, allowing him to immediately send it flying at Mibuchi with a simple technique called misdirection.

He sucked in a breath at how smooth the ball felt when grazing his fingertips, and once again decided, that  _this was all he wanted out of basketball._

It was for himself. No one else.

_Screw Akashi._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! Mayuaka is so great and feedback is always appreciated //fluffs at new ep hehe


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